Nope. Here’s a sad truth about movies that take place on the water: people are rarely having a good time. They all have perilous humans-vs-nature plots of being thrown overboard, lost at sea, or hunted by great white sharks. (Here’s a challenge to you pontoon-loving movie-makers: create a fun movie about a cruising ‘toon. I’d watch that.)
First up I tackled the original Overboard from 1987 and the reboot from 2018. (It made for two fun date nights!) My favorite thing about watching both versions back-to-back was how parallel they were, including the fancy yachts. Even though the pontoons I spend time writing about are all about comfort, there’s a whole crazy mansion-level on these luxury vessels. Especially cute was the newer version’s nod to a cedar-lined closet, as well as the recounting of an actual nautical legend.
My kids joined me for Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl. From my sailing background, I appreciated all of the sails, rigging, and deep-hulled ships. But the best of all was what I could hear. I loved the sound of the hull slicing through the water, the creak of the wooden ships as they turned, and the “zip” of the lines as they raised anchor and pulled the boom to leeward.
Of course, a movie marathon about the water just wouldn’t be complete without Jaws, and even if the animatronic shark didn’t terrify me as much as it used to, my kids were suitably scared by the menacing theme music. I was happy that the ship’s captain used the right terminology: starboard and port for directions and transom for tying up lines connected to the harpooned shark. As the boat fell to pieces and began sinking, the captain finally admitted his human frailty and handed out life jackets to his fellow shark hunters. His one smart move, truly.
However, the best part of watching this 50-year-old!!! movie was that the next day, my daughter learned the Jaws theme song at percussion practice. She told her friends, “Hey I just watched that movie last night!” Now what are the chances of that?
I also watched The Life of Pi (magical realism while lost at sea in a lifeboat) and Charlie St. Cloud (sailing with a bit of friendly haunting by dead people). But I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed The African Queen.
This 74-year-old!!! movie follows a 30-foot-long steam-powered pile of junk—a boat called The African Queen—as it weaves its way down the Ulanga river in Tanzania during WWI. Most similar to a pontoon of all the movies I watched, this uncomfortable open boat had wooden seats and a tattered shade canopy. Uppity service missionary Rosie (Katharine Hepburn) learns to handle the tiller and pilot the boat down the river while she slowly comes to appreciate rough-around-the-edges Charlie (Humphrey Bogart). At one point when they’re traversing wild rapids along a crocodile-infested river, Rosie exclaims, “I’ve never known such excitement! I don’t wonder you love boating.”
And that, my friends, is what boating is all about, isn’t it? These movies reminded me that the best thing about boating is how it taps into all our senses with a healthy dose of thrill thrown in. It’s an adventure that makes you feel alive—the sensation of being carried across the water and slicing through the waves while the wind catches your hair and a spray of water cools your face. I also don’t wonder you love boating.